After the death of her mother, Wynonna Judd finally speaks about her immense grief.
In her first television interview since Naomi Judd’s suicide, Wynonna spoke to CBS on Sunday morning about her experience.
“I got the call and I walked over and I saw her and that was it. I said goodbye to her in the hospital and I closed her eyes and I kissed her forehead and that was it. And next thing I know, I’m sitting here on the front porch, on the side porch … you know, and I’m just trying to figure out what’s next,” Judd said on the show, which aired in full on Sunday.
Wynonna and Naomi Judd – known as The Judds – have sold more than 20 million albums as a country duo. But in April their days together came to an end. Just a day before they were inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame, Naomi took her own life.
“I didn’t know she was at the point where she was when she finished it because she had had episodes before and she was getting better,” Judd said. “And that’s what I live in: ‘Was there anything I should have looked for or should have known?’ Not me. That’s why it’s such a shock.”
Naomi, who has been open about battling depression, died in April at the age of 76 from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.
“I can feel her nudge me. And sometimes I laugh,” Judd added. “And sometimes I’m like, ‘I really miss you. Why aren’t you here so we can argue?’”
Naomi’s daughters – Wynonna and Ashley – honored her at the Country Music Hall of Fame Induction after her death, but they were shocked to find they had been left out of the will.
In August, reports claimed Wynonna planned to contest the will, which named only Naomi’s husband Larry Strickland as executor.
While Wynonna has so far avoided interviews, Ashley, her half-sister, has not been silent. She wrote a New York Times essay describing the terrifying moment she found her mother and held her “working body” in her arms. In another interview, Ashley appeared on Healing with David Kessler and said she “understands” how much her mother must have suffered.
Until the interview with CBS, which airs Sept. 25, Wynonna has only paid homage to her late mother on stage or online, where she penned a heartfelt Instagram message in May.
“There is so much happening in the world right now. So before I sat down to write this, I was like, ‘No… I just don’t know what to say.’ Then I heard the words of my life coach asking me, “What do you know?” And I started crying,” the 58-year-old wrote.
“WHAT DO I KNOW?? I know the pain of losing mom to suicide on April 30th is so great that I often feel like I will never be able to face the truth they are so leaving has to accept fully and surrender to her. This is not how The Judds story can end,” she continued, adding that she feels “helpless” but swears for her friends, family and herself despite her grief to show up myself.
According to CBS, Wynonna plans to continue The Judds’ upcoming tour in memory of Naomi.